nirvelli_lynn: (Default)
[personal profile] nirvelli_lynn
I'm scared to send out interview packets.

I realize I shouldn't be. I realize that I should be all over this and that every day a new posting is announced, I should try to be all over that so I can get an informal interview at the academy. I've been procrastinating and make all sorts of excuses as to why I should wait a little bit longer. I'm not harming anything by waiting... most official deadlines aren't due til September or October. However, if I want to do informal/information gathering about each position at the Academy in Boston, I should email my packet out asap.

And it's not like I've been procrastinating on my packet. My packet is ready. I have 5 cover letter drafts targeting the various types of positions I would be applying for. My research stream, teaching philosophy, evaluations, and CV are all up to date and have been reviewed by my advisor.

I'm just ... waiting.

And I think I'm just not ready. I feel like I need just a few more days.  And in the meantime, I defend my dissertation proposal tomorrow. I'm teaching 5 days a week, and I really need to work on a fellowship application based on my dissertation that is due July 15th. So it's not like I'm lacking excuses other things to do. I just worry that it's not good enough. That I've missed something. That... that... it's just not ready...

I know I have to move on this soon. It's just the start of a giant leap. It's the prequel to the next chapter. And I'm a bit nervous.
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September 2012

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