Processing Time

[nirvelli_lynn]

Yesterday was mix of things... lots of business, a bit lost emotionally, (and huge cover up to try to hide that), and somewhat anti-social. Not good on a day when you have to be particularly social. But I made it. And it think the day went well. I retired home early, around 9:30 and crashed around 11. (I think?) I actually slept last night... that was good. the first night in awhile where I feel both physically and emotionally rested. I crashed out pretty hard since I didn't even hear Lindsay & Casey come in to crash on the futon.  I needed some "processing time". So much has happened in the past weeks and I've been constantly in motion. (Or just avoiding thinking which has also been a factor.) Last night I had a chance to just think while laying in bed. My processing time doesn't mean I come to any particular conclusions or anything... it just means that my brain can rest. I'll figure everything out consciously later... but the processing is mostly internal/sub-conscious. Ironic that I know how I work to that level of detail.. but I do.  It's mostly a matter of adjustment. Taking the time to let myself emotionally adjust to changes.  I know things are exactly the way they should be... it's just taking some time to adjust to everything. And I'm surprisingly less "wonky" than I expected.