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I refuse to do a year end review... mostly because if anything, I feel I have to move forward and not back.
I'm feeling caught and bound by the past in some ways... and in others I'm feeling like I will change things in the future. I do have my college applications in. I have only 2 more things to follow up on and I will be completely finished. This is the only thing that is moving me forward... well.. not the only thing, but the only tangible thing.
Other things have changed... my emotions for one... I've learned how to go internal. And I'm finding it not a bad place to be. I want to stay here for awhile. Maybe it will hurt me... maybe it will help me. I don't care to be honest. I just know that this is where I want to be... and that is inside.
I've written very little lately... and honestly I'm not sure how much I'll write in the near future. I'm not writing... talking little... and simply internalizing for awhile.
In a way... it feels good... because for once I finally have a modicum of control.
I'm feeling caught and bound by the past in some ways... and in others I'm feeling like I will change things in the future. I do have my college applications in. I have only 2 more things to follow up on and I will be completely finished. This is the only thing that is moving me forward... well.. not the only thing, but the only tangible thing.
Other things have changed... my emotions for one... I've learned how to go internal. And I'm finding it not a bad place to be. I want to stay here for awhile. Maybe it will hurt me... maybe it will help me. I don't care to be honest. I just know that this is where I want to be... and that is inside.
I've written very little lately... and honestly I'm not sure how much I'll write in the near future. I'm not writing... talking little... and simply internalizing for awhile.
In a way... it feels good... because for once I finally have a modicum of control.